sobota, 15 września 2012
He is a alienated. Probably lost in his other places. Distance takes size of the universe .. , even in our bed.
I could ask him about everything, be like a letter, torn from the pain and despair. Let it be me .. let it be us, people sick on the beauty of the trees.
Le'st forget about breathing .. Or walk away, without saying goodbye.
I do not know yet, how to win in the lottery of life. But soon I'll find out how difficult it is to keep this winning with me.
So we talk.
I'm drowning in those eyes...
I can't breath, with him on top on me..It's like him standing on my chest, looking down..With his eyes on me..
The first sentences are like a daybreak, like the first drops of the rain ... Trembling a little .. uncertain.
Im talking about how much I'm afraid of the storm,how the gray dawn laziness fills me, and how it's hard for me to breathe when I feel tired..
There is only the road, which is in our words. Everything is in one direction.
I'm telling how much I admire his calm and narcotic properties of his skin.
Dawn finds me in his arms ....
piątek, 14 września 2012
how many times in the dream bout t perfect ...
A PERFECT ... do not know ... perfect toast ... perfect tea ... perfect partner ... perfect perfection ...
we're gettin lost in pursuit of perfection we can not stuff we miss ct out'cos of that ...
and dreamed of perfect mornin bout last night ... tho strange dream ... i do not usually remember my dreams ...
and woke up ... turned my head round ... she was still there ... covered in white ... duvet wrapped wit ... cuddlin to herself ...
her hand still on my bed half o't ... sweet ... her hand still warm ... i was holdin it all night long ... her hair still smells of y'day ... bed sheet still smells of us ... lovely ... sexy ...
I'm gettin up ... corridor walk down t ... lights switched off r ... too early for light ... t walk into kitchen ... t put kettle on ... no milk for her ... she hates it ... i know babe ... i know ... i still remember ...
Boils water ... steam in air t ... Steady windows sittin on t ... mugs and grab t ... put hers next to her head on her bed table ... her eyes frozen in sleep ...
she looks so lovely when she sleeps ...
and stroke her cheek ... a ribbon of hair blonde slides down her forehead ... and smile ... t pull duvet over her shoulder ... she hates to be cold ... i love to keep her warm ...
and put music on t ... Ian Brown's neptune ... That track she likes so much ... I'd love to wake'er up right now but i do not ... let my princess sleep ... t turn the stereo up a bit ... and start to sing ... walk upstairs ... grab a comrade .. walk back down ... and levitate ... and slide in t bathroom ... t turn on tap ... neptune in air t ... shower ... steam in t air again ...
walk out ... and lean against sink t ... look in my own eyes ... and smile again ... I'm so lucky ... that i met her ... so lucky ...
splash my face wit cold water ... raise my head n there she is ... standin in t door ...
when she smiles back and smile ... no words just me lookin at'er when she's lookin at me ... here's my beauty ... and turn around ... she shines at me ... she's like a golden gaze ... n then she says: good mornin dave ...
n why t hell and woke up just then?!
I told him that I want to write, more than anything, just that, nothing else.
No answer, just a quick look..
I'll be ready to leave first..
I have to wait a few years befoer he lose me.
Sea, elusive in its shape, simply unparalleled.
Bustle of the city is very strong in my memory like sound too loud movie, sound that stuns.
I remember, we don't talk, the room is dark, immersed in a constant bustle of the city, anchored in the city, whose fragrance we breathe..
It is a city of pleasure, which fully rising at night. And the night starts now, with the sunset.
The smell of the caramel permeates the room , roasted nuts from won, exotic sauces, roasted meats, herbs, incense, burning wood, dust.
It's right here for me to survive the longest time, minion time, right here, nowhere else.
It is a place where it is difficult to breathe, bordering with death, the place of violence, pain, despair, dishonor, pleasure, holiness.
This is a place in the Cho Lon,on the other side of the Mekong where the river exceeds the time ....
I Realized That if you leave, I will always be suspended in space.
Sometimes I am trying to call it.
Give it a name, shape .. the smell of value.
I think this is nameless .. intangibles .. Stripped of realilty .. Only ours.
It's like treading on ice, you know what can happen, you know that you can die from this ..
But you are walking, in spite of everything
'' When U looked at me yesterday
I Realized something.
I Realized That Between you and beyond the reach world
is a strange, empty tunnel.
I do not know anyone else who knows this path.
Stuck travelers at the entrance to the tunnel
U know something I can not even call,
something more profound and unforgiving,
than I can ever comprehend.''
Between birth and death, said poet , there is only eternity.
The sun falls directly on the face through the window in the wall.
Live and love.
- Jazz is infinite -said Spanish in the evening.
No sign of snowflakes in the air..
'The sun rises slowly ..
I'm coming back to her studio, which she hires.
There's someone else.
- I've met him at a pedestrian - she explains.
I have to make myself comfortable. Make myself a cup of coffee or pour some vodka.
She's going out anyway..
Moth usually flowing out from her burrow.
Begging for grub, fed what she will dug, tracked, hunted.
I sat in front of the machine and tapped until she came back and grabbed me frome the state of perdition.
And long, long time nothing ...
Moth disappeared. \
Her world was plunged into eternal nebula.. She feared for her existence.
It was the most important thing for her.
She had to escape, just to not get crazy.
Injured by it all....
No one was able to stop her. '
It was after midnight when I saw him on the stairs, at the Devils doors. I can see him through the fog,
Then we are lying down on the floor like in the cocoon, breathing freely.
He sleeps, It's dark, it's quiet, the night poured in through the open window.
This darkness always falls so quickly that it barely can noticed it. We are in a different dimension, not applicable to our time.
If you ask how much I regret leaving You, I'll answer that my sadness is like falling autumn leaves ..
'' You can hide somewhere in the place known only to ourselves ....There she is ... poured into my room surrounded by the selfish love , ready to use all her tricks and theatrical masks, which arranges itself moving from dream to dream. I just returned from the beyond of the worlds. Eccentricity in his heavenly poncho
- Did You my lips? - She asked.''
Daybreak shouldn't be slept away without reason....
It goes without noise, dully, like a blood in the vains ...
*This city has a magic power..Before You notice it will get under your skin and steal the soul. *
You are kissing my skin and I am convinced that the cannibalism is the greatest incarnation of wisdoms.
I close my eyes
And the whole world is turning.
I wanted to tell you that life is beautiful ..
Like a bursting sky
I only wake up to see this destruction
And it's last forever..
And that's it
How can I write you?
We should talk to each other as much as possible
Because when one of us die, there are things that the other one will not be able to tell anyone else.